Princess Presents... Your "Fabulous Frock" Contestants....

Ladies... Gentlemen....
 and those of you that claim to be neither...



On behalf of the Organising Committee...

Princess would like to welcome you all to the Palais de Steff

Fabulous Frock Competition 2011

Princess has been quite overwhelmed with the number of eager participants  willing to show you their wares


Now remember Dhaaarlings... there are two categories that you are voting for

The "Most Appealing" 

and

 "Most Appalling" 


gowns of the evening..

And don't for get you could win this...
A...ahem... slightly used hip flask... Well i had to drink something while dealing with a full slot!

Allow me to present to you this years
"12 Fabulous Frock" entrants...


And now... It gives Princess great pleasure...
 to introduce to you someone whom... I know... has given us all so much pleasure and is one of last years joint winners for her most appealing entry...

Contestant#1

Mistress MJ


Mistress MJ Says....


"This red velvet dressing gown was designed by Walter Plunkett and worn by Vivien Leigh’s character “Scarlett O’Hara” in the 1939 classic film “Gone with the Wind.”

Why, you ask, am I wearing a dressing gown to a ball?

Well, you see, I know the gown will be torn from my heaving bosom as soon as Rhett Butler fixes his gaze upon me.

See what I mean?

*Rousing round of applause*


Thank you Mistress that was quite eye opening for all of us... 
And now having seen Mistress MJ...
 both in and out of her wind catcher...

~oOo~


I present...

Contestant #2

 Damien Oz


Welcome Damien... a first time entrant as he gracefully takes to the catwalk...
Damien has entered gowns for both categories this year...
 The "Most Appealing" 
and
 "Most Appalling" gowns of the evening... 
Over to you Damien

Frock 1) "My Fabulous Frock".......

"Coz,
a) White would ONLY ever be what I wear as it is tres classique like mois!!! 
and 
b)  Because.. Mistress MJ said the only ever colour I was allowed to wear was dog collar black"

Frock 2  "My Shocking Frock"

"This pink monstrosity is actually a dress that CHOLA’s  wouldn’t go near with their sharpies."
(to discover what a "chola" is darlings go back and click on the link... I had to)


Thank you Damien Oz... 
Give a big round of applause to our first "Catwalk Virgin"...


~oOo~


And now... I present for your enjoyment...

Contestant #3

 Mr XL


This year XL has chosen to go weeth something compleetely deeefferent...

Could it be the cigarette holder?
XL has instructed the orchestra to fire up as he would like to perform for your listening pleasure...








What a saucy little mix you are Mr Xl... Don't think I didn't notice you flirting with that chorus girl...


A round of applause for Mr Xl as he returns to a "ChiChi" or 3 back stage..


~oOo~


Introducing

Contestant #4

Puggerpete


 Mr Puggerpete does not seem to have his own blog as yet so I can't send you over for a visit. 
But as a newcomer and first time performer at the Palais... (Princess has spied him lurking about the Palais grounds) and although having not been formally introduced....
It seems he is willing to grace the catwalk with a partner to assist in displaying his gowns in each categorie...


Over to you Puggerpete...


Frock 1

. " This lovely dress has the added benefit of a Velcro closing in back; so much easier to remove... so I can wear him later"

Frock 2

b)  "The only redeeming value of this outfit are the diamonds that you can pawn"
Thank you Puggerpete... You will find the Pawn Shoppe just to the left of the Porn Shop as you make your way backstage... Both of them have balls hanging out front... Count them to work out the difference


Please but you hands together for our second "Catwalk Virgin"... Puggerpete


~ooOOOoo~


Our next entrant is

Contestant #5

 The lovely... Miss Scarlet

Miss Scarlet says....


"I thought that a cute dog might help me win"....


Along with  a little light entertainment perhaps?....
Sing along now Folks!






Arf Arf... I mean... thank you Miss Scarlet that was a lovely interlude....
A round of applause for Miss Scarlet as she makes he way back stage...
Oh... and Miss Scarlet... I do hope you will be arranging to clean up that little accident your doggie seems to have had.... Perhaps struck by stage fright?


Next on the Catwalk is...

Contestant #6

 Designing Wally



Designing Wally has entered frocks in both voting categories
And he too is a cat walk  first timer..


Frock 1

"I always am able to pull off (on every level), a strange and voluminous outfit".....

A ball, a trip to the grocer's or a dump, this outfit works for me....

 


"If I must wear shoes; they must be of the fruit-stripe-gum variety, as well as sensible."


Frock 2

"If I didn't like you I might wear this"....

Front Window

Rear Window




What a luscious "leopard skinny stringy thingy" you have displayed for us Designing Wally...


A round of applause for contestant number 6 as he steps gracefully... oops I think you got a heel caught in one of your strings... Either that... or miss scarlet is still hunting down a bucket and mop...


 Houseboys! Assist Mr Wally backstage please... and I hope you are making all of our contestants very comfortable back there....


*giggles and laughter from backstage*


And Now... Ladies..Gentlemen and and those of you who profess not to be either... welcome to the stage....

Contestant #7. 

 Roses

Roses has entered 4 lovely gowns
This is Miss Roses "Virginal Voyage" down the Catwalk
so welcome her warmly...


And in her own words...
"I found more appallings than appealings"....

Frock 1


"Appalling Gown"

Frock 2. "Full on Frump"

Frock 3. "Not a Nightie"

Frock 4. "A Wedding Gown"

"Though I will say... 

I would get married in the Wedding Dress, should RDJ ever get his shit sorted and ask."

Thank you Roses for your fashion insights.... 
Houseboys would you mind calling Mr "RDJ" to see if he has sorted his shit yet? We can't keep Miss Roses waiting While she's all done up in that lovely frock..
"What's that? He just has another case to get through? Oh... a case of Vodka!
And he might be a little late as he'll be in rehab...."
"Well boys... escort Miss Roses to the Vodka Fountain... I can see she will be needing something to stem those tears....


A round of applause for our 4th "Catwalk Virgin" Miss Roses if you please


now... our next entrant is no stranger to the Palais de Steff Catwalk... 
Welcome our joint winner from last year...

Contestant  #8

 Miss Savannah


Savannah has entered both categories again this year and is starting off with this Appalling entry... or better put in her own words...


Frock 1


"Unflattering OMG WTF was he thinking entry"

"This is my entry for the dress i'd never, ever wear...in fact, i can't even believe it was designer with the idea of being shown...in public without massive drugs being consumed."


Frock 2

"A Balenciaga that i wish I could wear and be belle of the ball again"


Thank you Savannah... 
A round of applause if you would for our Southern Belle...


~oOOOo~


Our next entrant is the winner of last years "Most Appalling Frock"
Let us see if he has managed to up the ante
I give you...

Contestant  #9

CyberPete


Petra has provided a brief description of her choices of gowns...


Frock 1



"My first of three divine gowns is this black feathery ensemble with matching hat and golden thigh high boots. All by Dolce & Gabbana of course."

Frock 2



"Or how about this divine white Roberto Cavalli gown?"

Frock 3

"Or how about this gorgeous white dress with diamantés.

I am certainly looking forward to seeing what everyone else is wearing even though all mine are sure winners."

Frock 4

"This dress - for Pride. Not sure it's appropriate though"

Oh Petra... that last one is more than appropriate I'd say...


A round of applause for CyberPetra as she leaves the catwalk to accost her throngs of awaiting fans....


Oh and Petra Darling... I think we might all know someone that could put that last little "Pride Number" to good use in their Bathroom...


Speaking of Witch...
I present for you our next entrant...

Contestant #10

Mr Inexplicable DeVice


In his own words...


Frock 1

This Fabulous Frock I found here: http://omtn-dnfanzz.deviantart.com/ and is a truly cosmic creation.  It would be ideal for displaying my alabaster legs, just be careful not to hoik my skirt up any more - I don't want you all seeing my docking hatch!


Frock 2 and 3...

  
"In keeping with the Star Trek theme...
 the Frightening one belongs to one Lwaxana Troi and is accessorised 
with an almost equally ghastly frock worn by her daughter, Deanna.
  
"Lwaxana's always over the top as is evidenced by those frightful shoulder pad/puffs.  Deanna normally looks pretty good, but this pink disaster can only be bettered by burning it.  


Plus, it 'tastefully' highlights her vaginal area with a big pink polyester vag!

Nice."

Thank you Mr DeVice now would you kindly leave the catwalk before you manage to blow someone else..........up.


Our next entrant and first time cat walker here at the Palais is...

Contestant #11

 Mr 63Mago


Frock 1

"A comfortable Greek ensemble ready for any occasion",

And this is the occasion Dhaaarlings so get dancing!



A round of applause if you please....


Frock 2








 "and something by Daghilev I never would wear..." 


Well Mr Mago.Thank you for demonstrating your fine expertise at performing "The Zorba" along with a couple of your friends.


I couldn't help my self ... just had to join in... and now I'm all puffed...


A round of applause please for Mr Mago...


~ooOOOoo~


And now to our final entrant

Contestant #12

Mitzi


Whom is also a first timer on the Palais catwalk and has worn a lovely wedding gown to finish the show for us...


Frock 1

"t'was a beautiful wedding dress made from faux human flesh which would have made Ilse Koch green with envy. It was exquisite. From Skinbag."




Thank You Miss Mitzi... the house boys are standing by with the sunscreen sprayer...






Give all our contestants a big hand now including our "Catwalk Virgins"


And that Ladies and Gentlemen and those of you that claim to be neither
concludes our catwalk show.

Start your voting!


Remember you are voting for 


"The Most Appealing Frock"


And 


"Most Appalling Frock"


And I'll see you all at the Winter Ball for the announcement of our Winners




And Good Luck to all our lovely contestants....


Oh how remiss of me to forget to mention that the voting lines will stay open
Until
Midnight Tuesday14th June.
Where ever you happen to be in the world!

Our operators are standing by to take your call....

"Fabulous Frock" Competitors.....And Voting Day

It's Voting Day
Dhaarlings...

On behalf of the Organising Committee...

Princess graciously welcomes you all to the...

Inaugural "Fabulous Frock" Competition

at
 "Palais de Steff"

Princess would like to..
Thank all our marvelous entrants and their

"Fabulous Frocks"

And and now folks here they are, give them all a rousing round of applause as

our delightful entrants approach the catwalk...

(Thankyou You Tube)
And remember what you are voting for...

A: "The Most Appealing Frock"


and


B: "The Most Appalling Frock"

There is a PRIZE for the winner in each catagorie!

So let's get on with the show now shall we?

Princess Proudly Presents for your Pondering and Perusal ...

Contestant #1.

Mr Xl

(Thankyou YouTube)

Sing along now...

*Applause* 

"Thankyou Mr Xl"...

Contestant #2.

Miss Scarlet Blue

"Whom appears to be Brandishing....

Her own sense of "Vertical Enhancement"

In a "Ravishing Little Red Number" ....

Reaching new and somewhat alarming heights on the catwalk"!

(Thankyou You Tube)

*Applause*

"Thankyou Miss Scarlet "

"Do you require assistance from a houseboy to dismount your prop"? 

And now welcome to the catwalk...

Contestant #3.

Mr Eroswings

"One moment please...

While

Mr Eros tells us all a little more about his "Harleqin Ensemble"

"Houseboy! Microphone for Mr Eros please"

"Thankyou Mr Eros, you have the floor"

"The shirt I'm borrowing from Olympic bronze medalist

Daisuke Takahashi of Japan".

"The pants I'm borrowing from the Norwegian Olympic curling team."

"The mask I found on line".

"The shoes I'm borrowing from MJ's Jan 3, 2010 post on shoes".

*Applause*

"Thankyou Mr Eros"....

Contestant #4

HRH CyberPetra

"The Queen of High Maintenance"

would like to say a few words, many words, "Recite an Ode" to each of her entries...

"Houseboy! Pass the microphone to HRH please"

CP #1 

 

(Forward Window)

 “Nolan Miller is responsible for this creation “Black Swan”.

(Rear Window)

"A feathered gown circa 1980 designed for the

"New York City Ballet Company".

How can one let this creation stay in an old Louis Vuitton travel case?

It must be seen as well as heard - and loud it is”!

CP #2

“As I was looking through the basement I found an old trunk in the back.

Something left from a previous tenant.

One who obviously had very little taste.

So I simply had to unroll an old rug that the previous tenant also left behind, and display this dress.

Maybe you could have it on standby in case one of your guests

 has forgotten that it is indeed a ball

I would not personally be caught dead wearing it, as I'm allergic to all things shiny and polyester”.

CP #3

“I adore vintage, even the more shall we say opulent - gaudy anyone?

So it is with great pleasure that I share this vintage YSL creation with you.

It has been in the royal collection for many years.

Hidden away as it's not something one wears out anymore.

 Yet, I feel it is time that it should be displayed for all and sundry.

You can say what you want about the dress, but,

“Yves Saint Laurent” knew what he was doing”.

*Applause*

Thankyou "Miss Queen of High Maintenance"

You may now leave the catwalk in readiness for our next contestant...

Which is...

*ruffling through notes*

Contestant # 5

 Miss Savannah

 S #1.

S #2.

S #3

I feel a theme approaching....

(Thankyou You Tube)

"Why Miss Savannah.... Your Gowns speak for themselves"....

*Applause*

Thankyou Miss Savannah

Contestant # 6.

Mistress MJ

"MJ would also like to say a few words about her entry"... 

"Houseboy, pass the microphone to Dear MJ please"

"You may recognize it as the black satin strapless number wore by Rita Hayworth in the film 'Gilda'.

Of course it isn't complete without seeing me, er, Gilda

shim and shake in the gown" ....

*Applause*

"Thankyou Mistress MJ for that gravity defying perfomance"....

And now welcome to the catwalk our final entrant...

Contestant #7

Mr Inexplicable De Vice

"Mr De Vice would also like a few moments at the voice projector"...

"Houseboy, if you will"

"Please... Cast your spell Mr De Vice"...

IDV #1.

"The first is a bit too "Kathy Najimi"

IDV #2.

"The second is "Too Slutty Cheerleader"....

IDV #3.

"As you can see, it's a little more "Incredible Cloak" than it is "Fabulous Frock"

 but it does come with several must-have accessories:

 The Orb-topped staff for beating one's way up the red carpet

The demonic horns for when one simply must bow before the waiting paparazzi...

  And thereby have their eyes out

 The frightful make-up which masks the damage done by standing over a boiling cauldron the previous night";

"And finally, the familiar".

 "Although, I can supply my own familiar in the shape of Clone-Beaky and he's at least twice as evil"!

*applause*

"Thank Mr De Vice"

*leaving the catwalk Cackling at the paparrazzi*...

And there you have it.

Please put your hands together for all of our wonderful contestants

And their "Fabulous Frocks"

Now Remember Dhaaarlings you are casting 2 Votes...

A: "The Most Appealing Frock"

and

B: "The most Appalling Frock"

Start Your Voting Dhaaarlings...

Princess will be Tabulating your Votes.....

And as soon as the voting is done....

 Will be announcing the Winning Contestants and Presenting Prizes

 at the...

 "Royal Gala Masque Ball"

I'll see you all there now....

Won't I?.....