Seaside Adventures #3.... Surf, Sun,Shark-bait. and Camera-Shy Cetaceans...

Hello Dhaaarlings...

I know!....

The title of this post sounds a bit like a line from a very bad musical

but let's continue our tour shall we?

Tweed Heads/ Coolangatta

The River Tweed acts as the State Boarder between New South Wales to the South and Queensland to the North

The view from the top.

A walk down and around the headland onto Queensland's Coolangatta Beach

 then back into New South Wales and Tweed Heads

Nearly did me in darlings... The down hill stroll was lovely...

But let me tell you... Hauling my arse back up the very same hill was a bitch! 

I thought that I was going to die on several occasions

Talk about being un-fit...

 Not only was I coming to terms with that ugly fact But then...

 as if to have salt rubbed into my gaping wounds...

 I had my very first taste of ageism darlings!

No really! Agesim! 

There was I... shattered and gasping for breath as I hauled myself upward along the pathway using the handrail when I hear from behind me...

"Out of the way Grandpa...Coming thru!"

I turned around in response to the comment thinking that it had been made to some gentleman behind me.

Imagine my horror in realising that I was the "Grandpa" being referred to! 

And racing up the hill toward me at a pace...

 Came a stampede of feral sporty mums... about 5 in all...

You know the ones... wearing gaudy lycra body suits, sports sunglasses, headband with matching wristbands and running shoes, earplugs wired to some sort of musical device and, a pram full of baby in front of them... 

"Rude bitches" I gasped back at them while trying to catch my breath

As they thundered past in a clouded mix of stale perfume and sweat and dirty nappy... 

I hoped in earnest that their sporty three wheeled  prams all got a flat tyres.

Despite my ordeal I did manage to get a few pics to share with you

.

In the pic at the top... the small black dots in the water... just out past the rocks...

 are a colony of surfers, sitting on their surfboards awaiting

 the next attack from a great white shark...(There had been several shark attacks, one fatal in the weeks prior to our vist)

And further away in the distance

 you can just see the towering apartments of 

"The Gold Coast"

A popular tourist destination...

The view from the bottom... including a rock painted as a tree frog...

Can you spot the scantily clad lad standing on a rock?
 He is halfway up the escarpment to the left of the frog...

 I could only imagine what he was getting up to

The view of the Tweed River where it empties into the ocean between the two break-walls.

As you can see.... 

the day was quite overcast and it was very windy

 needless to say there wan't much action on the beach...

Although the car park was quite busy
I think most of the people were patronising theAllegedly...very good coffee establishment across the road...

I wouldn't know... as the Empress insisted on packing a Thermos Flask of hot water
and all the accoutrements to make our own refreshments...

The river Tweed

The tweed is a large river that winds it's way slowly from the mountains
then meanders out across the fertile flood plains...
Where sugar cane, bananas and potatoes are grown.
The smoke in the distance is a sugar cane crop being burnt off before harvest

We sat here for a little while just watching a couple of Whales 

"Humpback Whales"

 heading off somewhere further down the coast... Sadly... every time they surfaced I had the camera pointing in the wrong direction

But they were quite fascinating to watch all the same...

As were some brave gents taking to the water and making the most of some bright sunshine....

We spied a lone board paddler communing with a pod of dolphins...

The dolphins made their way through a small colony of surfers further up the beach... the dolphins remained quite camera shy... and there were more whales spotted at the mouth of the river and crowds were gathering to see them

We decided to drive to higher ground to see if we could get a better view of the dolphins... and whales... But alas... by the time we had made our way through some roadworks, traffic lights, and finally found the road up to the point... the crowd on the breakwater and the dolphins and whales had gone. 

Even the surfer colony had given up on the lack of swell and had gone too...

Not that it mattered we still had a lovely view...

And a nice cup of tea...

Our next adventure will feature some Arse...

I Promise...

Bottoms Up Darlings...

Seaside Adventures... Part 2

Hello Dhaaarlings...

I hope you've recovered from that awful visit to Sea world...
And the horrible invasion of the Smelly Triffids...
Here is the next instalment of our seaside adventures  

On our travels home we stuck mostly to the east coast... which meant that for much of the drive we had some marvellous seaside views...

Given that the weather remained cool there was not a lot of seaside frolicking to be observed sadly or for that matter to take part in... we settled to observing some of the wild life 

 We did manage to spot a number of creatures that were able to go about their business quite unencumbered by cages and pens held captive by big corporations.

A Rainbow Lorakeet sampling some flower nectar... Usually they travel in large flocks but this one seemed happy just hanging about on his lonesome...

A lone Gull of some sort off in the distance... 

A "Red Backed Fairy Wren and partner"

It took me ages to get this shot as they are a very flighty little birds, and don't stay put or within shot for very long... I did quite a bit of bush bashing... swearing quietly under my breath and standing motionless for long periods of time in an attempt to get a decent photo while they darted about seemingly oblivious to my quest... quite intent on having a shag...

"White-winged Chough"

A bird I have seen often in my travels but didn't know what they were or the fact that they stay in family groups and all have ago at rearing the young communally...

This was only a small number of over a hundred or so that went squawking and flapping about in all directions... Diving out of the sky and forming packs on the ground... I'd never seen so many in groups all at once...

I suddenly felt like Tippy Hedron as the Empress announced

"The Birds are Gathering"

My favourite of the wren family " Superb Fairywren" who stopped flitting about from his skirt chasing just long enough for me to snap his arse!
I know... I here you saying "What is it that we are are we looking for again Prinny?" look very closely right on the top of the big rock on the centre of the picture darlings... see the little blue stripes and the black spot... 

That's it! His Arse

And whilst walking along a breakwater we came across a dinosaur ....

more commonly known as  a "Goanna"  

sunning himself by the sea and clinging to the rocks forming the break wall... He is well camouflaged so look closely at the centre of the picture... 

What do you mean "It looks like a bit of driftwood lodged in the rocks"?

That's the whole point darlings... camouflage!...

We eye-balled each other for a good five minutes before he got tired of watching my lame attempts at trying to get closer for a better shot, turned and scurried off between the rocks...

And finally a flock of sea birds gathered along the shoreline

They were a bit far a way to identify so i wont even try

But the waves do do make for a lovely backdrop...

Join me next time for a squint at some whale habitat and a colony of surfers practising at being burly for the next  great white shark attack...
Those barstards are mad... 

Invasion of the Triffids...

Hello Dhaaarlings...

Two quick snaps of some rather strange fungi I spied in the garden on our recent travels north.

So far I've not been able to identify it, (not that I've done a lot of extensive research... well none really)

But still... I did find it to be quite fascinating in both it's colour and shape...

But it did smell a bit like poo with a tinge of rotting flesh!

For now I'm referring to it as a red triffid

*Update*

After some exhaustive research... well a ckickerative enquiry on google

my searching has been resolved...

I've just discovered that it is commonly called a red "Red Star Fungus" or a 

"Stink Horn"

Read more about them "Here" Darlings

I'm spent now and need a good lay down to rest my fingers after all that hard investigative keyboard research...

Bottoms up! 

Seaside Adventure Series... Part 1

Hello Dhaaarlings...

Join me for a quick series of Seaside adventures from The Empress and my recent tour...

Sea world on the Gold Coast in Queensland meant that we had to travel over the border for the day.
Home to many and varied sea creatures

We had visited the attraction over 20 years ago and back then you paid your entry fee and then could visit the displays, watch the marine creatures and go on the rides at the fun park for free. These days not so much.

As we entered the park the Empress commented on how she was looking forward to seeing the water skiing exhibition with pretty and graceful ladies balancing above the water on the shoulders of some very strong gentlemen all done at speed in lovely floaty costumes whilst being towed behind a motor boat...

Imagine her dismay when we discovered that the lovely water skiers had been replaced by 6 brawny young gentlemen in very tight fitting wet suits racing about about on very noisy and splashy jet ski's going over jumps and doing tricks...
"Well, that's a disappointment" she said getting up from her seat...
"But their "costumes" are quite impressive Mother" I implored
"Well... I'm not sitting here to watch this noisy rubbish" she replied, 
"I get enough hoons going past on motorbikes every day and night at home without all the splashing" she muttered, heading off to the next attraction. 

The main attractions and rides are still for free but to see some of the newer animals and exhibits you have to pay for the up close and personal experience.

And they are not cheap. 
$50.oo to have your photo taken with a dolphin!

More money to have an encounter with a polar bear...
And certainly don't expect cheap eats...

A basic egg and lettuce sandwich - $8

150ml Bottled water - $4

Softdrink - $7- $13 

Just as well we'd packed a few snacks and bits of fruit...

So needless to say the Empress and I managed to get around to all the freebees that we could... 
Most of the rides were unsuitable for the Empress who has never been very keen on roller-coasters (of which there were 3 to choose from) and as the chair lift was closed for repairs, we settled for the monorail.

6 trips later... and we were thoroughly exhausted!

Here are some snaps of the freebees that we did manage to see...

A sad and lonely dolphin... About to undergo a training session so that it can be moved easily by it's human captors...

but a least there was a nice consolation arse to view in the process...

Which almost made up for the whole awful experience..

Come and feed the seagulls... er... I mean seals

At $10.00 for a cup of 4 sardines and a bit of squid I'd rather have mine Battered and served with Chips thanks...

Why not have a go at petting a stingray? 

(It almost worked for the crocodile man)

Or perhaps being water misted by a mechanical Leviathan as it roars at you as you go past is more your cup of tea?

No?

Well... What about being yawned at by a grumbling overgrown crocodile?

No? Me neither...

Give me a proverbial pod of pelican Any day!

Fortunately we missed the sea lion show.

I was not keen to see seals dressed as a sheriff and more seals dressed as  robbers with some wanker out the front on a microphone making out that it was some sort exciting mystery that "Sheriff Sea Lion" would solve the "Big Bank Robbery" by the end of the show. 

All this done on a stage more suited to the American Wild West theme park... 

I did say that we missed the show... but sadly on one of the loops on the monorail it just happened to stop and hover above the show for long enough to hear the overexcited wanker get louder and louder as the "Robbers" escaped by waddling through a door onto a plank and diving into the pool...

"it's all natural behavior" he shouted.

Especially when you have been born in captivity and know nothing else I thought...

We missed the morning session of the dolphin show so got back in time for the afternoon session, but sadly the batteries had died in the camera by that stage, well they died much earlier in the day and I'd left the spare set over the border...

The Empress did a lot of ooing and ahhing during the dolphin show as the dolphins sped through the water with their captors riding on there backs or leapt out of the water with one of their captors balanced on their nose and then throwing them up into the air... but thinking back she was probably complaining about the pain in her feet.

The whole place is just one big commercial promotion having been taken over by a number of large multi national companies like Cocacola, Nickelodian et al

Much of the day was spent avoiding the life sized Dora the Explorer and friends or Spongebob Squarepants and his awfully obnoxious entourage running about the grounds...

And they're still claiming to be an animal wildlife and conservation service and not just another income stream for big business...

Yeah... right