that appeared in a magazine called
"The Auatralian Womans Weekly" which appeared on June 10th 1933...
"Its star attraction was L. W. Lower Australia's leading humourist at the time.
Through the depression and the war years Lennie Lower kept them laughing...
With, his outrageous columns on anything from revising an encyclopaedia while
eating a stolen orange to, hobnobbing with hitler"
PartyTricks that will Thrill the Guests...
The imminence of festivities invariably demands the blowing up of balloons and other preparations for parties.
Too many hostesses leave their preparations till the last minute and are caught in the act of teaching the butlers how to form fours and leap obstacles.
The hostess should see that, right from the start, every guest is made to feel at home.
With married men, a smack in the face as they enter the house is sufficient.
Women should be spoken to in a friendly, tactful way, such as, 'My you do look haggard!' and little touches like that.
Butlers should be oiled up about announcing the guests as they arrive.
For example: 'Mr Psmythe-Harris…Drunk.'
'Mrs Cholmondely Jones…With a new hat on.'
'Mr Kennedy Clofe! Lock up the spoons.'
Failing this, it is quite easy to provide a little amusement oneself.
The hardened host or hostess will find that a game of 'Hidings and Seekings' is essential at various stages of the party.
The host or hostess invariably goes 'IT'. He or she counts a hundred while the guests scatter and hide. 'IT' then cries in a loud voice, 'Coming...... ready or not!'
He, or she, then lights a cigarette, puts his or her feet up in the mantelpiece, pours him or herself out a rum, and says,
After about half an hour the hidden guests will give themselves up voluntarily.
The game of 'Murders' is still very fashionable.
You draw lots to see who is going to be the murderer, and nobody knows who it is. Then you put the lights out and then the murderer pretends to murder someone, and when the lights go on again you’ve got to find out who did it.
It makes the game much more interesting if someone is really and actually murdered.
People who insist on singing 'Beneath Thy Window' and 'I'll Sing Three Songs of Araby' are good subjects and would never be missed. I have got rid of a lot of people that way.
The finish of a party is no less important then the start. The hostess will usually find herself left with about twelve people who have missed their last trains, trams or boats home.
September 23 1933.
From the book 'Humour in the Weekly' by Currey O'Neil