Sunday, January 3, 2010

Suggestions of Vice at the Palais???




As you can see...Princess has been up all night wracking her Brain....













A Dear friend of mine, whom I worship, has asked Princess for suggestions of new vices that she may pursue for 2010, as, it would seem she has become weary of making New Year Resolutions...


Like Resolving to maintain World Peace...



And Solving the worlds hunger problems.......






So Princess has discovered some Wonderful Vices that may be of interest.....




An Old Favourite of Grand Fathers





He spent many an hour at sea ,teaching himself and fellow crewmen the finer points of......

"Naked Knitting"...




Then of course there is "Pole Licking"




In some circles it would appear to have taken off already




My Houseboys seem to....






Have adopted this Vice with much fervour....




Then I thought that a lively Vice could be "Premature Balloon Popping"...


You know .... sneaking up on Balloon Dancers and bursting their bubbles out of sync with their


dance routine music.....






Of Course there is always "Nude Head Standing"




The Empress Dowager loves using this as a punishment for Naughty Houseboys





"Now Cracky Leg Open" she cries and then titters.....


The following Vice came to me following inspiration from our mutual Fiend Mr Beastie...


And No that is not a typo!



"Lighting Cow Farts"






Or.... Just lighting Farts in general....



This Old Fart looks his best when Back Lit



Then there is my all time favourite Vice.....

"Fan Dancing"....

I just find the tickling texture of Ostrich Feathers against my skin......



Incredibly stimulating and arousing.....


And a Final Vice suggestion....

"Dancing with Wind-up Dolls"

I believe that it is going to be a demonstration Vice at the London Olympia

So Get Cracking with your Practicing.....

The Chinese Team entry is already well advanced in their training!

And I Think this is one of the Men's pair teams in training....

But am unsure of their country of origin....

Princess would be grateful for any tips on their Identity!

Now where Did I Leave my Feather Fans? .....





I feel a Dance coming on!! "Houseboy! Find my fans NOW!"

8 comments:

  1. There is an episode of Las Vegas in which Vanessa Marcil asks a stripper a very valid question.

    How often do they clean the pole?

    She never gets an answer. Bleugh!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I know this post isn't about me. But hell darling, it is all about me.

    Therefore, I was also considering a new vice this year...I like the idea of dancing with fans (as opposed to wolves). I won't be licking any poles (or Poles) this year, I'm not a keen knitter, lighting farts is a bit vulgar for my tastes.

    Hmmm....I'll have to give it further consideration.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Perhaps it’s time to take up knitting again.

    Click here to see my previous attempts.

    I’m still working on a new uterus.

    ReplyDelete
  4. My Dear CP,

    Perhaps "Pole Licking" is the answer then. I shall consult the Pole Dancing Federation for advice!
    *Quickly Googles PDF*
    I will get back to you on recomendations soon...

    Luv Princess XXX



    Dear Miss Roses,

    I am Glad that you are not dancing with wolves ... Yet, I did think that Mr Costners' "Stunt Bum Double" was very cute!....

    Unless of course it was his own, and that makes it even cuterer!

    "Fan Dancing" is such fun! Pop on over for a lesson or two!

    The Palais is a Smoking venue!

    Luv Princess XXX

    Ps. I shall consult with Mistress re A "High Maintenance Fruit Fly Award"


    My Dear Mago,

    Princess is already "Puzzled" enough!

    The last time I tried the Fandango it led to a marvelous Tango, with a Bongo player from the Congo! Oh...The things he could do with his instrument!

    Ahh... the Memories !

    Luv Princess XXX


    Dear MJ,

    That Uterus was probably worn out from all the horn blowing on NYE!

    Knit 1, Purl 1, Knit 2, Purl 1, Slip stitch, Knit 1, Pass Slip Stitch over, Pass me the Vodka!

    I can hear your needles clacking from here.

    You are Naked are you not?

    Luv Princess XXX

    ReplyDelete
  5. I'm looking forward to the answer, dearie.

    About the knitting, I can't help but thinking that MJ was doing it all wrong the day after new years eve.

    It wasn't knit, knit, hurl. Was it?

    ReplyDelete
  6. My Dear CP,

    Following extensive reserch and consultation with the IPDF.

    (Initially I mistakenly contacted the International Polish Dancing Federation who suggested that to keep their Poles clean they make them bathe and shower regularly)

    Eventually I did get onto the "International Pole Dancing Federation"...

    Princess has discovered a site that may well provide a long awaited answer to that burning Vegas Question.

    Visit http//www.electrapole.com

    and I am sure you will find all your curiosities regarding poles answered even suggestions on cleaning.

    As for the Mistress Knit Knit Hurling, Is that not an olympian event in OH Canada? Perhaps she is practicing for the team!

    Go Mistress!

    Luv Princess XXX

    ReplyDelete