Thursday, April 29, 2010

How To Be Glitteringly Glamorous.....

The following is an exerpt from a regular humour column that appeared in a magazine called
"The Auatralian Womans Weekly", which appeared on June 10th 1933...

"its star attraction was L. W. Lower Australia's leading humourist at the time.
Through the depression and the war years Lennie Lower kept them laughing
with his outrageous columns on anything from revising an encyclopedia while
eating a stolen orange to hobnobbing with hitler"

How To Be Glitteringly Glamorous...
Simple Hints for Home Treatment

Lennie Lower

There are quite a number of beauticians from abroad in town at the moment.
It hardly seems fair to us local beauticians to have the country flooded with outsiders, but still I suppose we mustn’t be selfish.
If we can’t learn anything new from them at least we can teach them something.

It’s pure carelessness, more than anything else, that makes a woman look a down and out deadbeat.

Exercise is the great thing. Try standing with the feet apart
and swinging the arms around madly for half an hour.

Have an ambulance waiting outside.

When being carried out on the stretcher, let the arms relax and drag along the ground. This sooths the tendons and gets rid of superfluous flesh off the knuckles.

Deep breathing is excellent for toning up the system. Breathe in through the nose and exhale through the mouth, taking care before commencing to nail down all light articles in the house.

Nothing is more conducive to good health than deep breathing. As a matter of fact, practically any kind of breathing does you good. People who don’t breathe soon get a pasty, haggard look.

There are all sorts of ways one can take necessary exercise in one’s own home.

Shaking cocktails vigorously is one way. Let yourself go when shaking. Shake all over.

Let the cheeks flop up and down so that they completely envelop the ears at intervals. When feeling tired, relax, drink the cocktail and then start all over again with a fresh shaker full.

You will find that after a couple of hours one has such a feeling of wellbeing that it is only with great difficulty that the neighbours can restrain you from smashing all the windows in the district.

That of course, is merely laying the foundations of good health, which is essential in beauty culture.

There are quite a number of good skin foods on the market, but the best are those that you make yourself.

A simple way to tone up the complexion is to rub the face with egg. Leave the egg on for two or three days and wash it off by dabbing with milk holding the face over a bowl.

When removed from the face the mixture in the dish can be used for making excellent pancakes simply by adding a little flour and sugar.

Many women are worried by an over supply of fat on the hips. For this, try rolling on the floor whenever you think of it. Do not do it in the street if this can possibly be avoided as it ruins the clothing and accidents may occur…..

April 30 1938

From the book "Humour in the weekly" by Currey O'Neil


  1. That first pic of MJ is fantastic! Wherever did you get it? She's notoriously camera shy.

  2. Dear Mr Device...

    I thought that it was only fair, given some of the photographs of me that MJ managed to weedle out of me... in recent times.

    Unfortunately a lady does not disclose her feminine wiles nor, her papparazzi persuits...

    But thankyou interpol for the mug shot.....

  3. Ha! That rolling on the floor is hilarious!

    But I'd say go for the cocktail shaking and the arms swinging! It's a party!

  4. Eros

    True thirties spirt!

    It is amazing to think that this is when these articles first appeared 1933...

    I am facinated that "Melbourne" in the thirties allowed such comments to be made. Without the outrage that would no doub't fill the airwaves these days...
    I think that today, twits everywhere would be buzzing...

    Though these articles obviously did not offend at the time... as he became such a "must read" humourist in his day...

    I just love his work...

  5. I am swinging my arms at IDV as we speak!

  6. I'm working on shakin that cocktail baby!

    Hey gorgeous. How're you doing? Miss me?

    I just popped by to say whotcha!

    Mwah fabulous!

  7. Oh MJ,
    We have all seen your "Shim and Shake" and you make it look so easy...XXX

    Hi there Ms Roses

    Well hell yes...
    Thought you may have been having so much fun that you had decided to stay...

    Welcome back! XXX

  8. Hardly dahling. They're a bit straight over there for my tastes. Just not enough fabulous.

    I missed you.